Shifting Gears

Posted by Jacinta Hin on November 4, 2006

The other day I had coffee with my friend Ilze who I had not seen for months. When she congratulated me on reaching my goals, I wondered what she was talking about. She said the last time we had met I had told her I wanted to have a certain number of paying coaching clients by the end of summer, which indeed I now have. I did not remember I had set that as a goal. In my mind it simply had started to happen for me since summer.

But when I went back to my notes of the beginning of the year I found a detailed plan for building up my practice with clear target dates and milestones. A plan I had completely forgotten about.

What I had not forgotten were the intentions I had also set in the same notes. I had carefully chosen intentions to guide me towards reaching my goal. Although in my notes they accompanied the goal, they were actually intentions for overcoming obstacles and self-realization.

And the intentions have been guiding me constantly this year. I refer to my intentions all the time to get answers of what to do, how to behave, what choices to make.

The key intention for me this year has been “to be bold”.

My vision for my coaching practice is not only to help others become independent champions of their authentic selves, but also to be a voice, to share my insights and to reach a large audience.

Behind this vision is a strong desire to express myself. Coaching is the medium I have chosen for that purpose and to be bold is the guiding principle to become free and fearless in being that self-expressing person.

To be more precise, to be bold is what I knew I had to be to overcome one of my core fears, a fear that was clearly in the way of being free and fearless: the fear of negative opinions of others, the fear of rejection. A fear that was making me needy of being liked and needed by others.

And surely when I look back on my days of corporate employment I realize how scared I was most mornings to open my emails, convinced it was full of angry and irritated responses of coworkers and clients, and how I constantly was looking for compliments and other signs of appreciation.

Today, in reflection, I feel truly free of fear of opinion of others. I no longer seek approval and don’t read rejection in other people’s disinterest in or criticism of what I say or do. I still have lots of other fears to deal with, but this particular one is no longer in the way.

And by being bold I have also reached my goal.

I realize working with intentions is a great tool for me. I find goals and plans boring. They have little meaning to me. I know I need to have them, but I realize once I have a goal all I need to do is create the intentions to help me turn the goal into reality.

And when I make sure the goal is always in my true-self-best-interest, the intentions automatically become magnets for self-realization. And all I need to do than is to let my actions be guided by my intentions. I can forget about the goal and the plan and don’t need to celebrate any milestones.

So thanks to my friend Ilze I now know how it works for me. She is moving to Shanghai soon but hopefully via cyberspace she will keep an eye on my goals for me.

In the meantime I am ready to create a new goal and set some new intentions.

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