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	<title>Jacinta Hin</title>
	<link>http://www.jacintahin.com</link>
	<description>Just another WordPress weblog</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Wed, 11 Aug 2010 10:54:32 +0000</lastBuildDate>
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	<language>en</language>
	
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		<title>Stuck Between Realities</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Imagine leaving a dead-end situation and taking that much-needed break. Still unsure about what the next step will be, you simply enjoy doing nothing. 
But then what was supposed to be only a couple of weeks of rest and contemplation stretches into months, even years. There’s plenty to do because somehow you’ve managed to fill [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=339</link>
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		<title>Opening Up To Change</title>
		<description><![CDATA[We&#8217;re always looking for change while at the same time fearing and resenting that it might come to pass.
We dream of a different life, yet the thought of leaving our familiar nest fills us with terror. We think about the things we want, but immediately dismiss such thoughts as unrealistic and impossible to have. 
Even [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=336</link>
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		<title>From Forgiveness to Acceptance</title>
		<description><![CDATA[When we forgive someone for something, we let go of toxic energies that keep us stuck in hurt, resentment and blame. 
Provided the intention is genuine and not just an “I’m the better person” ego booster, we’re able to move on and create space for the relationship to take on a new, more positive dynamic. [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=296</link>
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		<title>Self Connection</title>
		<description><![CDATA[A daily and deep connection with the inner self is essential to our (well)being. 
Ironically, we often only begin to understand this self-connection after it&#8217;s been broken, abandoned or ignored and we find our zest for life has weakened, or we become depressed about everything in general and nothing in particular. 
We might enter long [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=301</link>
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		<title>Do You Recognize Yourself?</title>
		<description><![CDATA[If your answer is negative, you&#8217;ve probably adopted qualities that are basically alien to you. 
To a certain extent we all do that. We adapt to our environment based on what we believe is expected from us or on what we think we want. When our focus is on external images of success we set [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=269</link>
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		<title>Surrender</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Surrender is a spiritual skill that tops all others in its ability to set your life on its right course. (Cheryl Richards on twitter)
We often have a negative association with the idea of surrendering. It feels like losing control, giving in or giving up, evoking images of defeat, abandonment, or yielding our power to someone [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=230</link>
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		<title>Your Starting Point&#8217;s Wherever You Are</title>
		<description><![CDATA[When desire for change arises the question of &#8220;where to start?&#8221; is usually not far behind.
Here we often procrastinate in the belief that those first steps need to be perfectly aligned with goals, plans and end results.
Of course, a good start is important, but the initial details often don&#8217;t matter as much as we think [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=173</link>
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		<title>Different Worlds</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Imagine a world where everybody is expressing themselves wholly without shame and hesitation. Here blooms awareness of our inner being and talents.
Life&#8217;s eternal sacredness is expressed through every action and behavior. So good is it that we sense utopia and are filled with the happiness that only comes from freely helping one another.
But now consider [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=126</link>
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		<title>Staying Calm</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Hearing the renowned mystical scholar Andrew Harvey speak about the importance of doing calming practices in the current Sacred Awakening series, I was reminded of how I had lost my temper the other day. 
It was late and raining. I was on my bike, cold and eager to get home. 
A group of people was [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=106</link>
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		<title>Demystifying Purpose</title>
		<description><![CDATA[For a long time I thought that I needed to find my purpose. I even believed that one day it would magically come to me. I imagined my spiritual awakening coming in a flash, to be followed by absolute clarity and an instant shift of my whole being. 
From then on my purpose would be [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=94</link>
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		<title>Choices</title>
		<description><![CDATA[When you&#8217;re unsure what to do, you can delay making a choice and just explore your options a little deeper.
Or you can accept that any decision has a degree of uncertainty, make your choice and adjust as you go.
You can also zoom in on your doubts and look to see if they&#8217;re justified.
Recalling that each [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=93</link>
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		<title>The Trouble With Goals</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Many of us are pretty good in setting goals but falter when following through. We begin with the best of intentions but along the way somehow focus is lost and we eventually give up.
Here are some of the common reasons we get stuck and confused with implementing goals.
We forget. Daily life and default habits take [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=91</link>
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		<title>A Day at a Time</title>
		<description><![CDATA[How would you like to begin seeing challenges and creating change as manageable, step-by-step processes?
This is what I do to help my coaching clients move from overwhelm into overview, so that they learn to focus on what&#8217; possible now. This way they also start to trust that whatever they do today can open the door [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=86</link>
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		<title>Soul Eyes</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Are you looking at life through the ego&#8217;s eyes or those of your soul? Don&#8217;t be surprised when your experiences and perspectives change depending on the view chosen.
The ego is needy and rarely satisfied, always thirsty for more of those short-term highs. It&#8217;s often bossy, judgmental and wants you to take an opinionated stance.
Its restlessness [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=82</link>
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		<title>Stepping Back</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Ever found yourself enmeshed in a sticky situation and needing to do something about it? Before making any decision or taking action, it&#8217;s often best to step back and see the bigger picture.
When you&#8217;re too closely involved your feelings and emotions can dictate your behavior, making it even more difficult to find a way out.
Sometimes [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=81</link>
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		<title>Praise for the Positivity Blog</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I read a lot of blogs and newsletters on self-improvement and self-discovery.  I follow famous professionals I admire, people I know personally, and a few life-coach and self-development enthusiasts who also happen to be insightful writers.
On busy days I just glance through or even delete the lot without reading any, knowing tomorrow will bring me [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=79</link>
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		<title>The Art of Disappointing</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Tweeting on Twitter.com I came across this quote by the fabulous Cheryl Richardson:
You cannot live an authentic life without mastering the art of disappointing people (with grace &#038; love).
I shared this little gem of wisdom with a client and a friend. Both are dealing with conflicted feelings about how people around them are reacting (negatively) [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=78</link>
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		<title>The Right Question</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Ever find yourself stuck between choices? Often there&#8217;s a deeper question lurking in the background, waiting to be addressed.
Some years ago I was making myself miserable thinking I had to choose between my home country and my adopted country. It felt like an impossible choice to make; yet I believed everything depended on making the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=76</link>
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		<title>From Discouragement to Encouragement</title>
		<description><![CDATA[It doesn&#8217;t take much to bring someone down.
We dismiss ideas using dampers like &#8220;that will never work&#8221;, or we disqualify what was just said with the &#8216;but&#8217; word, often followed by a discourse on why we know better.
We steal a person&#8217;s spotlight by interrupting them midway through their story and take over with our own.
We [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=74</link>
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		<title>Why Do We Compare?</title>
		<description><![CDATA[We compare all the time.
We watch someone deliver a speech and think they&#8217;re not in the same class as someone we saw earlier that day.
We observe a person&#8217;s achievements and conclude we would have done a better job.
We look at where we are in our career and believe we&#8217;re falling behind the people we started [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=73</link>
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		<title>The Flow of Stress</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Sometimes I slip on banana skins of anxiety and stay down for a while, unable to get back on my feet. I go for walks, consult trusted sources of wisdom, even eat the right food; but am unable to snap out of it.
It&#8217;s a profound and painful state that finds me always unprepared.
I can choose [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=72</link>
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		<title>The Right Direction</title>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#8217;s always interesting to watch people who&#8217;ve finally figured out where they really want to go in life, begin moving in the opposite direction.
You ask them about their future and they describe in great detail where they will be and what they will be doing. Their whole being comes alive. If you would hand them [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=71</link>
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		<title>Themes</title>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Goals are boring&#8221;, I thought while in the middle of a proprioceptive writing exercise. &#8220;What then, should I work with instead?&#8221;I asked. &#8220;How about themes?&#8221; came the response.
That got my attention.
Goals work well for many people, but they just do not excite me.
I enjoy being on the road towards the peak, but the peak itself, [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=69</link>
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		<title>The Unique Gifts of Others</title>
		<description><![CDATA[One way to look at the people in your life is to understand the one key quality they bring you.
Some people inspire, some people teach you something, and some really see you for who you are. Other people have a calming effect, or take care of something for you.
The list is long and not limited [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=67</link>
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		<title>Perspective on Choices</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Sometimes we find ourselves stuck with the choices we made. Yet undoing them is hard.
Walking away from a situation we created ourselves undermines our values. We believe we owe the people who are affected by our decisions or feel we are obliged to stick to them. The list of why we cannot overturn our choices [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=66</link>
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		<title>Good Conversation</title>
		<description><![CDATA[In my busy life I easily lose track of myself. My to-do list is long and everyday I am distracted by an endless stream of both important and mundane tasks.
Yet, some days take an unforeseen turn.
An unexpected encounter with an old friend turned out to be an opportunity to review and reflect on what matters.
Through [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=65</link>
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		<title>Owning our Truths</title>
		<description><![CDATA[The truth always supports you, my teacher says. I let his words sink in, and realize how true they are and relevant for my current state of mind.
Then why are we often so frightened of the truth?
We tend to see the truth as some form of judgment, sentencing us to make changes we might not [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=64</link>
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		<title>Disconnection</title>
		<description><![CDATA[In the train the other day I observed a somewhat disturbing scene between a man and a woman. She, red-eyed and teary, was looking for his attention to which he was completely unresponsive. He was slightly turned away from her and had his eyes closed.
Perhaps they had recently broken up, or she had just received [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=62</link>
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		<title>The Purpose of Pain</title>
		<description><![CDATA[When I am in pain I know I am experiencing the coming together of emotions of the past, present and future. A blast taking place in a split second.
Often pain visits me when I least expect it and tends to stay for a while. A happy quest feasting shamelessly on a banquet of fear, guilt [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=61</link>
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		<title>From Default to Choice</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I am heading home from a day of surfing. It has been six months since I last visited the beach and I wonder when I stopped having time for what was once a non-negotiable weekly outing.
I am exhausted, but utterly content. Every single muscle in my body is hurting, yet I feel more alive than [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=59</link>
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		<title>A Conscious Mind</title>
		<description><![CDATA[In the gym the other day it occurred to me I was feeling guilty for spending time there. While my rational mind made me feel good about working out, the taking-care-of-others part of me was in disagreement for wasting time on taking care of myself when I could be responding to my many emails.
I could [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=57</link>
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		<title>Hidden Answers</title>
		<description><![CDATA[My client was struggling with a decision, so I asked her to revisit the original reasons that had brought her to the situation she was in. She struggled with that too.
Then she came across a piece of advice that gave her the answer she had been looking for: have high intention and low attachment &#8211; [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=56</link>
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		<title>Loose Ends</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Nearing year-end I make a list of loose ends.
The list is long. I am a master of unfinished business. My email inbox is full of messages that need responses. Numerous activities I once was passionate about are being neglected, as are some relationships that are in dire need of attention and clarity.
I still need to properly [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=54</link>
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		<title>Checkpoint</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I  have to make an important decision and am at a loss as to which way to go. Every time I work through it logically and systematically I come  to different conclusions. All scenarios have pros and cons, and depending on  what perspective I take each outcome makes total sense.
When  I [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=53</link>
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		<title>A Matter of Attitude</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Once a month I travel by train to a small provincial town about two hours away from Tokyo. I always take the same route, but the other day, for some reason, I decided to take a different one. Bad idea! The express train I had counted on had no empty seats left and I was [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=51</link>
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		<title>Self-defense</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Whenever I get defensive I know I am hitting on something I need to work on. It&#8217;s very likely something I don&#8217;t want to deal with. Probably something that requires me to face some harsh truths.
It almost always takes me by surprise. A casual comment, often well-meant, can trigger a huge offensive on my side. [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=52</link>
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		<title>Going with the Wind</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I am spending four days on a beautiful tropical island in the company of a group of windsurfers looking for wind. Staring over the ocean they analyze, look for clues, come to conclusions and make calculated guesses about wind circumstances at other beaches beyond eye reach.
They are accomplished surfers who master the art of reading [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=49</link>
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		<title>What I Really Want</title>
		<description><![CDATA[This morning I wrote down some things I want for myself. Reading it aloud I realized it was not exactly what I wanted, so I changed the words until they felt right.
Actually, it was not just a matter of wording. I went a couple of inches deeper, turned up the volume and got down to [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=47</link>
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		<title>Comebacks and Bigger Games</title>
		<description><![CDATA[This week I saw the legendary band the Red Hot Chili Peppers play in Tokyo&#8217;s largest stadium.
It had been a while since I was at a sold-out mega concert. The moment I entered the premises I was in for an amazing experience.
The band was superb, the massiveness mesmerizing, but what fascinated me most was the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=46</link>
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		<title>Bittersweet Distractions</title>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;So what is holding you back&#8221; my coach asked me. &#8220;Fear and self-doubt&#8221; I wanted to reply, reluctant to confess the less glamorous truth.
Over the past few days I could have worked out my goals for the coming months, finished an article and started on a coaching program I plan to develop.
Instead I spent considerable [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=44</link>
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		<title>On Course</title>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Wherever you look, that is where you go&#8221; says my windsurf buddy Pieter. He is explaining a new technique to me he just tried out which resolves around mastering this windsurf basic.
A nice metaphor for life. Staring out over the ocean, I wonder in what direction I am looking and realize I am not so [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=42</link>
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		<title>Confident or Arrogant?</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Over lunch the other day my friend explained how arrogant he was before coming to Japan and that his experiences here have really humbled him. He went from a big body to a nobody to a somebody. Today he operates from confidence. He feels confident about who he is and in what he does. Yet [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=40</link>
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		<title>Retail Meditation</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I left the planet for the afternoon.
I went shopping with a girlfriend for an outfit to wear for an upcoming formal party.  In the midst of a busy workweek, I abandoned all my duties and roamed the galaxy of dresses and shoes.
An afternoon of pure delight. No other thoughts than those related to size, [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=38</link>
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		<title>A Way of Being</title>
		<description><![CDATA[While I am enjoying an ice-cold beer after a day of sun and windsurfing, I watch my fellow windsurf-club members laughing and joking around. I am utterly content because today I finally booked a long overdue lesson and learned a basic yet critical for my progress technique that I had been afraid of trying.

Since last [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=37</link>
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		<title>Outside Our Head</title>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;I must get out of my head!&#8221; my friend proclaimed. I immediately realized I needed to do the same thing. I bet chances are you too have a tendency to walk circles inside yours.
Inside our heads is usually where we are when things are not really happening for us. It is a cramped little place [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=35</link>
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		<title>Love Your Questions</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I love questions. I love asking them and getting them. In fact, asking questions is what I do for a living.
For me, the best conversations are full of questions. Questions, when asked with genuine curiosity, are invitations to investigate and verbalize thoughts, and give birth to new thoughts and perspectives. They are also a form [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=34</link>
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		<title>Mission Impossible</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Today I accompanied my friend to the tax office for his corporate tax filing. In our mind this was going to be a mission impossible, a task that really needed to be outsourced to experts. Over 50 pages of documents the tax office had sent in advance did not reduce the feeling that we were [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=33</link>
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		<title>Distancing</title>
		<description><![CDATA[When is the last time you stood still and looked at yourself from a distance?
Regardless of how busy, balanced or bored we are, we all have a tendency to go through our days on automatic pilot. We blindly follow our habits and keep looking at happenings with the same perspective.  We do things in [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=32</link>
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		<title>On Top of Things</title>
		<description><![CDATA[&#8220;I am so on top of things&#8221; my friend Richard has been declaring all day today.
Since we both work from our homes, I often work at his place. Today I indeed witnessed him flying through his to-do list with a level of assertiveness, determination and focus  I have seldom seen in him before.
For the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=31</link>
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		<title>Despair and Doom</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Many of us live with a sense of despair that we are stuck with the consequences of choices made in the past. Although we have a desire for change, we belief it is too late, that we missed the boot and need to stick it out. With time passing and age progressing we feel that [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=30</link>
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		<title>Complementary Labels</title>
		<description><![CDATA[This morning I caught myself labeling people. I was sitting on the train playing my favorite game to pass the time during my many Tokyo commutes: looking at the people in front of me one by one and passing judgment &#8211; she is pretty, he is boring, he has no style, she is plain, he [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=25</link>
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		<title>The Art of Asking</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Many of us are champion wheel inventors and lousy askers. I became aware of how bad we actually are while reading &#8220;The Aladdin Factor&#8221; by Jack Canfield and Mark Victor Hansen of chicken soup for the soul fame. This gem of a book explains about the importance of asking for what we want, how we [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=18</link>
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		<title>And/and versus Either/or</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I set my alarm clock for 700am this Sunday morning to go windsurfing. I had even prepared breakfast the night before and figured out the bus times that would get me from my country house to the surf beach in the shortest possible time. I was all set.
Then I woke up around 530am in the [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=14</link>
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		<title>Confidence Regained</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Yesterday I got my confidence back. I lost it slowly and got it back instantly.
This summer, after a 20+ years break, I got back into windsurfing together with some friends. After a couple of months of renting a beginner board, I recently bought my own. A very cool latest model Starboard with a classic Gaastra [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=13</link>
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		<title>Practical Matters</title>
		<description><![CDATA[Two days ago I declared to my husband that I absolutely dislike anything practical. I lashed out in a 5 minutes monologue listing all the practical things I hate having to deal with. It amused him and was liberating for me. He knows me quite well and nothing was new. I struggle when it comes [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=8</link>
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		<title>Breaking Habits</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I attended a somatic coaching workshop the other day and learned something about habits. When I attempt to talk about something that is difficult and personal I tend to tilt my head to the right as if to turn away from the topic.
I had no idea I did that, but ever since the workshop I [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=7</link>
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		<title>Not All Whys Are Equal</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I had a very busy, hectic and chaotic week. You could say I barely made it. I just about survived.
A great week by the way.
Looking back, this question came to me: why do we do what we do? What makes us do certain things and avoid other things?
Digging into the whys behind my actions and [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=6</link>
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	<item>
		<title>Shifting Gears</title>
		<description><![CDATA[The other day I had coffee with my friend Ilze who I had not seen for months. When she congratulated me on reaching my goals, I wondered what she was talking about. She said the last time we had met I had told her I wanted to have a certain number of paying coaching clients [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=4</link>
			</item>
	<item>
		<title>Snap Out Of It!</title>
		<description><![CDATA[I am pretty grounded. I have organized my life around my life purpose. I let myself be guided by my values. I am intentional in my behavior. I am a master of forgiveness and acceptance of myself and others. I love my work. I have great friends. I often have fun. I am pretty happy [...]]]></description>
		<link>http://www.jacintahin.com/?p=3</link>
			</item>
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